6/ the only thing i need to do
The deeper I drop into meditation, the clearer I become that I am not who I think I am.
The deeper I drop into meditation, the clearer I become that I am not who I think I am. I'm limited by my mind, with its limiting beliefs about myself and what I can and cannot do. I now smile at how much I used to cherish my mind, though, in so many ways, it's the very device that is holding me back from expanding, living up to my potential and becoming my greatest self.
My mind is not an enemy (I still love my mind) but it is an obstacle to my being and the quality of my life when left to its own devices. And even intelligence backfires because it amplifies the belief in one's understanding and having certainty but that knowing is simply a belief that the mind creates based on its very limited understanding of the world and myself. And no matter how smart I am, it’s a very limited and biased understanding based on what I have learnt and experienced which is rarely Truth but I am living as if it were and all my decisions are driven by that false belief.
In the meditations, I sense how anything is possible. Yes, I am limited by physical reality but I can dramatically change that reality by changing my beliefs which then creates change in the "real" world. We are all powerful beyond measure, we just have forgotten because of the amnesia we are under in regards to our underlying nature. And that’s the very thing that is holding us back from our biggest evolutionary step and true unfolding as a species.
We constantly operate from lack, scarcity and limitations. Because that’s what the mind knows, how it operates and what it is here for: To ensure survival. But in 2022, the risk of immediate danger and death is very limited, yet that's what our thoughts are mainly busy with: What could go wrong? And this is the very thing that is holding me back: Being focused on survival when I could be focused on the upside. What would be possible if I lived from a place of no fear? What choices would I make? What life would I love as a result?
Living from a place of fear, worry, regret and what could go wrong is so very limiting, constraining and painful. There is no joy in it. Yet it is hard for us to see because it is just the way the mind operates. Until we tell it to stop. It is about learning to get out of my own way: The only thing standing in between where I am and where I want to be is me. And beyond that, where I want to be is also a product of the conditioned mind until I wake up to my real nature.
In a way, awakening is a double awakening. There are two layers. A psychological and a spiritual one. First, it is the realisation that I am my own enemy and how my false beliefs create my thoughts, actions and life because I am engaging with the chatter of my mind which is not me. And secondly, because I am not who I think I really am and life is not what I think it really is and therefore I am not here in this body for what I think I am.
I am not here to survive. Survival is a necessary condition to experience life but life is not about survival but about unfolding and thriving. What's the point of surviving when it is married with ongoing suffering in the form of stress, dissatisfaction, negative thoughts, or feeling not enough or not loved?
This means I can overcome my limiting beliefs and consciously manifest my dream life - but that is not the life I came here to live. Most personal development helps us to become someone, to will our life to what we think it should be. And it works. But true awakening is about realising that life is not about conveniences, power, achievements, impressing others, being comfortable etc. but it’s about coming alive to who I truly am and unconditionally expressing myself authentically and fully from a place of love, clarity and peace. Everything else will keep me in some form of suffering because I am living someone else's life.
As it says in Our Deepest Fear: And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others - and thereby one by one the whole world wakes up, heals and comes to love and light. It’s a celebration of life. The awakening of life itself recognising its true nature. That is why we are here. And what a celebration it will be. We are all destined to wake up. That is our purpose. It is inevitable. And the sooner it happens, the sooner the world transforms. It's not a utopia, it is bound to happen as we evolve one by one.
But at the moment most of us are just existing, worrying, chasing pleasures, comfort and safety with serious faces and mostly looking at our phones not the world. We have created our own dystopia by refusing or not being able to wake up yet. I am meant to be present, in the moment, with whatever I am doing, walking means walking not walking, talking and looking at the phone. Making the most mundane a sacred ritual is awakening.
When every minute of my life I am fully present to and in awe with what is unfolding in front of me. When infinite possibilities are collapsing to this unique moment that the universe has never seen before and will never see again. And I am witnessing and co-creating it through the way I am being. How incredible and beautiful is that?
We spend most if not all of our time chasing tomorrow, the future, when things will be better, or we force ourselves to be present by drowning ourselves in drugs, alcohol, meaningless sex, gambling, etc. because we have not yet discovered that divinity is present in every single moment of our lives.
But when we do, a whole new world opens up and the way we experience and go through life is profoundly changed. It’s a quantum shift, it’s a game changer. It’s that biggest step in evolution that no one is talking about.
So how can we live this truth unconditionally? How can we continuously move out of my fear and suffering? Because when we do, as we model this way of awakened being we give others permission to do the same. And just like a butterfly can cause a storm, the whole world transforms. Beautifully and seemingly magically just by itself. And this is why I am writing: To help me become clear that waking up is really the only thing that I need to do.