When I become still, I connect with my true self, my eternal self vs. the psychological construct and finite ego self. And I recognise that while I can do what I want in life, there is only one path that makes sense, that deeply resonates within me, that is me, and all the choices collapse into one choiceless choice. There is only one authentic way to be and do.
It’s not the easy path, it’s not the obvious path but it’s the only path that makes me light up, that makes me thrive, that leads to a fulfilling life vs. a life that might look successful from the outside but leaves me empty inside. That is because I don’t get to choose who I am. I am who I am before I come down here and slip into a body. And I am here on a mission. On a mission to wake up to remember to learn my lessons and thereby to expand and grow and recognise my true nature.
Maybe I am just making this up. But what I do know is that once I started connecting with my true self, it became clearer and clearer who I need to be in this life. I might be scared of it, I might resist it, it might seem inconvenient, it might require me to change my relationships and my life but deep down I know that it is the only path, the only way to be authentic and true to myself and the reason why I am here.
And yes, sometimes I pinch and ask myself, am I making this all up, am I going crazy? Should I not simply go back to being “normal” and do normal like getting a job or building a business? I can do that and I have enjoyed doing that. But then I realise that I have a far more powerful skill: I can help people on their journey of healing, of recognising who they are so they wake themselves up to their greatest power and most beautiful life. Just as I have been and am doing with myself. I have learnt: In authentic being, the messenger and the message are the same.
And isn’t that the most beautiful gift? Why would I throw this away and do something seemingly safer, more accepted, easier or materially more rewarding? And on many days it's not a clear answer because the conditioning of my ego is strong. I’ve been educated into using my head and reason for navigating life and it seemingly has served me well in many occasions, or has it?
Maybe it has been really good at detracting me from the path I am here to walk and at last, as I am listening less to my mind and more to my heart, intuition and inner calling, I seem to be on a path that is in alignment, fulfilling, more rewarding, more peaceful, calmer, less fearful as I am making peace with life and trust that it will bring me everything I need when I need it.
I am still struggling with these things as I am transitioning from trying to understand and navigate with my head to the faculties below the neck. It’s a seemingly hard transition because it requires a lot of un-conditioning, a lot of letting go of old habits, a lot of surrender, trust and going against what I’ve learnt and been doing all my life. And it’s hard. But something keeps pulling me.
Incredible people suddenly turn up in my life supporting, guiding and encouraging me on this journey. And as I am writing these lines, I am realising again, yes, this is it. I can feed my ego with all the great things I could be doing on the material plane or I can feed my soul and surrender to the path that I came here to live. As Wayne Dyer said: “You can either be a host to God (your true self) or a hostage to your ego. It’s your choice.”
When I write these lines or when I talk with someone or leave them a message about how they can navigate the difficulties in their life, it just pours out of me, I don’t have to think, it’s effortless, it’s clear and it strikes a cord, it resonates with whoever the message is for and it elevates them in their journey and it enriches mine. In that moment I am reminded that this is who I am.
I can do a lot of things and as human beings we have the freedom to choose whatever we want to do. And yet the calling to the this journey is strong and I can’t ignore it nor the feeling that there is some profound work to do. And it feels like not doing that would be a huge missed opportunity, a failure.
So choosing this path becomes a choice-less choice. And I believe deep down we all know who we are and hence finding and connecting with that truth and then living it every day is the path to a fulfilling life. It’s both beautiful because no more choices are needed and it’s hard because it might go against everything you have been telling yourself.
But when you get really still and quiet, you know who you truly are.
That’s it for this week. I hope you had an inspired one. Have a wonderful weekend and see you next week.
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