Thinking is a disease. At least in the way I have been using this capacity all my life: For decision-making. Thinking was not created for me to decide what to do by weighing one option against another through reason, thinking was created to be creative, to create.
When I use thinking for decision-making I create misery because logic is not what drives life and well-being. We are all familiar with the situation where we need to make a decision and we are advised to write down the pluses and minuses of the different options. Hell, I have given this advice to clients in the past.
In fairness, this exercise can help become clear what are the pluses and minuses. But that’s it. The decision is not to come from the mind or logic, I want to make it from the heart because only my heart, my intuition truly knows what I want and where I need to go.
When I follow my rational plus minus sheet and choose the option with the highest score it might seem right but if it doesn’t feel right it is not right. Simple as that. Thinking is a disease when I use it like that because it keeps me in perpetual suffering by making seemingly reasonable choices that take me away from who I am and what I want.
I know intuitively what’s right and wrong for me. The problem has been that I have been told otherwise (and I listened) and so I started doubting myself. Logic is presented as the tool to navigate life and that creates suffering. We are humans not machines. I make choices that are "reasonable" because I don’t trust my inner voice. How can I trust anything if not even my own guidance and intuition?
It is fascinating how different my sharing is perceived by different people. I got messages from my parents reading my "bursts of consciousness" that they are worried about my reputation and my mental health. I am doing really well. I am more clear than ever and I am finally letting go of the distractions and attachments and the desire to please other people and worry about what they think.
I am becoming attuned to my true self and have the courage of speaking my truth, with compassion, as I think we are all meant to do. While I have compassion for my parents, they are creating their own suffering by worrying about what they can't and should not change. As an adult, I am finally healing and breaking out of the prison I have unconsciously built myself. And hopefully, I empower others in the process to tear down the walls they have built for themselves as well.
My parents just like most of us are also overthinking and therefore worrying and not realising how they are cutting off their life force and creativity to live in presence and serenity. Worrying and telling your children what to do are probably two of the most destructive forces in the world. It is coming with the best intentions and yet it is destructive nonetheless. The road to hell is paved with good intentions… And I am having no more of it.
If others choose to worry that is their journey but I am no longer falling prey to their worries. I am trusting my inner guide, my own truth and I am walking that path with clarity, confidence and conviction. I was not born to worry but to create. The less I think (and worry), the more I can create from a place of powerful presence.
Next week will be an exciting one as I am shifting gears sharing the unfolding of my week-long Ayahuasca retreat.
Share this post